Saturday, September 27, 2014
A day late and a dollar short
Time Travelers do it Anachronistically
by Alison Bruce (and friends)
I know a few Western Romance authors who have dabbled in time travel, or even made it the focus of a series. I have also been tempted. So far I've only pulled characters forward in time in order to interview them. My alter-ego, Nighthawk the Avian Interviewer, would pull anyone from anywhere to introduce the character to a new audience.
Nighthawk is retired, but here's a taste of the old crow's show.
Under A Texas Star.
You’ve been traveling with Texas Ranger Jase Strachan and, from all reports, been a significant aid in his investigations. What are your career goals?
Cherie: I want to host a reality series - something that combines my two loves: fashion and extreme skin care.
Nighthawk: I meant our guest, Cherie. Marly, do you see yourself continuing to work with the Texas Rangers?
Cherie: I know you're disguised as a boy, but what do you do to keep a healthy glow on the trail, without burning your cheeks, your nose, your forehead?
Marly: I’ve got a hat.
Nighthawk: Cherie, Marly doesn’t exactly have access beauty products, you know. Respectable women didn’t wear makeup - boys certainly didn’t.
Cherie: Not so! A man with a little money to spend might get a facial from his barber. Though maybe he didn't call it that. Women had face creams and tonics to clean the face - or remove freckles.
Marly: I kinda like my freckles but Miss Cherie is right. My aunt didn’t hold with vanity but she washed her face with sour milk once a week to keep her complexion healthy. She always wore a hat to keep the sun off her face and used rose water when she bathed. When I turned sixteen, she gave me a bottle of lavender water because she said that was better for young skin and the stronger smell would keep me fresh.
Cherie: Did she pinch your cheeks or show you how to put lamp black on your eyes?
Marly: I’ve seen how other girls do it, but that would have been too wanton for Aunt Adele.
Nighthawk: Yes, well... How do your skills match against your average Texas Ranger?
Marly: So far the only Texas Ranger I ever met was Jase. I’m a greenhorn compared to him - especially in the saddle. I’m a good shot, though. Aunt Adele taught me to shoot with a rifle and Jase taught me how to shoot a revolver.
Cherie: Tell, me, do you get saddle sore, or do you optimize all those hours on horseback to tighten your glutes and abdominals?
Marly: My what and my what?
Cherie: I can suggest some isometric exercises that will keep you toned and strengthen your pelvic floor. Happy muscles lead to happy skin.
Marly: Well, ma'am, I'm not sure about happy muscles, but I'm stronger than I look. I've also got excellent hearing. Fact is, I think I hear Jase callin' me now...