Weddings in the West

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Due to the number of weddings and funerals that happened along the trails, most Wagon Masters would not head west until a Vicar was procured to travel with the group. Out of necessity, Wagon Masters could perform these duties, but most didn’t relish the extra burdens. Often the Vicar or Circuit Preacher would return and travel with the next train west. Traveling preachers also provided many of the first trail stations or towns along the way with weddings or church services on a regular basis. The Circuit Preachers were also responsible for stopping at county seats or state capitols and filing all the deaths, births and marriages.

Even in towns, church weddings were rare in the early 1800’s. Usually the affair happened in the home of the bride or groom, or a family friend. Attendance was generally small, just a few relatives and friends. (This was true of funerals as well, and it was up to the family to prepare the body for burial. Usually more people attended funerals than weddings because a death meant the entire community had suffered a loss.) If needed small communities would assign one person to reside over weddings and funerals until a preacher traveled through and officiated the already performed ceremony by completing and filing the paperwork.

After their wedding, a newly married couple was expected to stay home for the next few days for others could call upon them. The dress was something the bride could wear again or already had. It wasn’t until 1840 when Queen Victoria wed Prince Albert in an elaborate white, satin gown that the tradition of a white gown started to spread. However, the color and ability to keep it clean held the tradition at bay until the early 1900’s.

Here’s an old poem, published on many internet wedding sites, (I couldn’t find the date of its origin)… “Married in white, you will have chosen all right. Married in grey, you will go far away. Married in black, you will wish yourself back. Married in red, you’ll wish yourself dead. Married in blue, you will always be true. Married in pearl, you’ll live in a whirl. Married in green, ashamed to be seen, Married in yellow, ashamed of the fellow. Married in brown, you’ll live out of town. Married in pink, your spirits will sink.” (Perhaps it wasn’t Queen Victoria, but this poem that encouraged brides to wear white!)

There were a few traditions most weddings tried to uphold. The veil being one of them, it signified maidenhood, and therefore usually skipped by the bride for a second wedding. Often veils were passed down from generation to generation. The tradition of the wedding veil comes from the times of arranged marriages. The bride wore a veil so the groom couldn’t see his bride’s face until after the ceremony, assuring the man couldn’t back out once he saw his bride. Also, a law in 1775 forbid brides to wear any kind of make-up, assuring the groom wasn’t trapped by an ‘illusion’.

The cake was also important, it signified fertility and abundance, and it was generally a fruit cake—that is until baking powder and baking soda were invented, then a white cake became popular and the fruit cake became the groom’s cake, which was usually cut into pieces and sent home with the guest.

And the ring…It signified eternal love. The wedding ring dates back to 2800 B.C., this was the time of ‘ownership’ and the ring signified possession. The tradition the wedding band to be worn on the third finger of the left hand is because it was believed that finger has a vein that runs straight to the heart.

Church weddings grew in popularity throughout the 1800’s and by the turn of the century weddings, which included dances following the ceremony, became more popular, namely because when the couple was married in a church, more people could attend, therefore the event became a social gathering.

I’m currently writing a few stories in the roaring twenties, when big parties and big weddings were stylish, hence the reason for the wedding post. Hope you all enjoyed it. 

Cheers!

Trousseau and doilies

I associate a lot of things with the old west and not just the cowboys that first come to mind. While I'm all about reading tales regarding the cowboy and his many antics, I also find other occupations and traditions fascinating. Today, I'd like to visit weddings. Almost all of the weddings I've written into my stories have been preformed under duress or very hastily. I love the tension created by those circumstances. However, most weddings were planned and orchestrated. They were festive events that brought a large community together.

In preparation for this glorious celebration, the bride often had a trousseau, a collection of items for when she married. Gathering items for a trousseau began long before there was a potential groom. Girls placed their prized items in a hope chest that was often placed at the end of the bed. While I never really mentioned a trousseau, two weddings take place during Once Jilted. Actually three if you count the one in which the groom never showed.

Regardless, back in the day, it was customary for the girls in a household to begin early on their trousseaux. They would learn to crochet, knit, tat, quilt and embroider. As part of the process, they would create items to decorate a home that would someday be theirs. Pillow cases, dresser scarves, table clothes and dish towels would all go into a hope chest for the future. These prized possessions were then stored in a hope chest so named for the hope that they would one day have their own household.

Above is a sample from my grandmother's hope chest, a dresser scarf that she crocheted as a child. The close up reveals the double stitch she used in the pattern. And while the heroine of Once Jilted, might not have had a hope chest because of her circumstances, her friend Lora Lee would have.

Ciara Gold
www.ciaragold.com